I woke up this morning to that nagging feeling that the enemy had slept at the foot of my bed last night. I know it was him. He's done it before. I dream disturbing dreams, I toss and turn, and then I wake to that feeling of a heavy heart and full mind. I let my feet touch the floor and I hear a little whisper in my heart, "Today is going to be stressful, you've got a lot to do, you are tired, your new job.. well you are sucking at it...and on and on the whispers went. That dang devil I tell you, he really does come to STEAL- KILL- AND DESTROY!! I knew I was at one of those very pivotal crossroads, the choose your own adventure, where you know one page will take you to some awesome story, while another, will take you down 55 pages of crap that you would have been better off never reading.
I remember listening to a Joyce Meyer sermon once and she talked about, or should I say she warned us to beware, " Every morning you wake up, the Devil is ready for battle. He has a very specific plan for your day, for your thoughts, your plans, and your peace, and he has no problem battling God to make sure His plans for you life never come to fruition. Be ware friends, there's a battle going on every morning for your mind....you chose who wins!"
And I did, I chose.
Unfortunately for the enemy I am one stubborn piece of work, and I serve a faithful God. No bottle of shampoo spilling on the floor, large medical bill, unruly temperamental 18 month old, or new batch of flipping baby hairs that stand straight up no matter how I do my hair, or what product I use to paste it down, will ruin my day!!! I refuse to let the enemy win. You know that's how he does it, if he can just tip you over, stress you out over something little, surely he's got you and before you know if your entire disposition will be off. Your peace will be gone, and the course of your day will be entirely derailed from the beauty and blessings God had in store.
This morning I decided....
If you game to steal, I will hold on tighter, if you came to kill, I will love more, and if you came to destroy, well than dammit buddy I will build my house, my security, and my peace on the truth and word of God!!! You may not have this day, YOU WILL NOT WIN!
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So instead, today I will write a little list of happy. I will intentionally spend a moment of today to document just a few of the many splendid things that I am grateful for. Brace yourself people, there's a lot of happy coming...
1. Kale Chips. Sound weird? It's not I assure you, they are like gold, each and every one of them. They are healthy, they are delicious, and I am grateful that I can afford to these little pieces of heaven. You see I don't take for granted even the littlest things...being able to afford healthy yummy food.
2. My husband. The guy is redic. No really he is! And while I could go on and on for all the millions of reasons why I love and appreciate him, today I am grateful for 2 specific things. His support for me and what I need/want, and his incredibly hard and admirable work ethic. Since Livy was born, and I quit my job, we solely relied on the Lord to provide for our family. It was a long shot in my mind, but thankfully the Lord he is BIG. On one income, with changes, sacrifices, and many fortunate opportunities, we have been able to live a wonderful life these past 18 months. However, before baby number two comes along (we are going to start trying late spring) we have a few things we want to do, financially. Pay off a little debt, add to savings, and build a little bedroom addition. You know small things. Anyways we have prayed and prayed for the ideal opportunity for me to make a little extra money yet still be a stay at home mommy. We have prayed and prayed. We tried a few times to take things into our own hands and try to force certain jobs that failed MISERABLY, which of course they would. It wasn't God's plan it was ours, but in true God fashion, in the middle of the winter, when most construction workers struggle finding work, Derek's company has plenty...AND he has been offered side work opportunities, AND low and behold, I have been blessed with a part time, on my own terms, in my own hours, as much or as little, work from home, marketing/assisting job for a friend and his real estate business. My friend has been wonderful to work for, and what he needs from me, I happen to love doing and be decent at. Now how any of this even ties into being grateful for my husband is this; Derek has worked his butt off to solely provide for our family, fully supporting me staying home and living my dream of wife and mommy. BUT he also has totally supported me working a little. He is my biggest cheerleader, and tells me how great and talented and smart I am. He also has told me on several occasions that if I ever feel overwhelmed, stressed out, or negative in any way as a result to this job I could quit. I mean you guys, he is like chicken soup for the soul. This man he loves me with such a Christ like love, it's all I can do to not go on and on about how wonderful he is. Point being is this. Today was a day, where I realized, yet again, how fortunate I am to have a man who supports my passions, and a man who encourages me to dream, and do so while also making sure my load doesn't feel too heavy. He's offered to help out with dishes and laundry when he gets home, so I can go work for an hour. He's prayed for me, and rubbed my feet after a long day of duties, many of which I choose to put on my plate. I'm grateful for a husband like him, he makes me want to be a better wife, a better mom, and generally just a better human being.
3. I am grateful for Starbucks. Although I hate the way my hair and clothes smell when I leave, I love the coffee, the music, the atmosphere, and the fact that they have monopolized the market so much so, that even in the middle of no where Idaho I can drive 5 minutes and arrive at my "office" only to be welcomed with a spinach and egg breakfast wrap, a decaf peppermint americano, and NOT an old fashion glazed doughnut thanks to my accountability partner and sister Ashlee, seriously she's good! I kid you not I've never wanted one of those baby's more than I did today, and that's even after the two cake pops I had yesterday! Needless to say there are a few kinks here at the 'office' I'm going to have to work out, but Ash she saved me.
4. My mother. Oh Lord am I ever thankful for this woman. Not only did she literally give me life, but she fills my home up with so much life every time she visits.She somehow manages to love on my daughter, give her the most attentive one on one play time, all the while folding clothes, putting away dishes, vacuuming, and starting dinner. She also serves as therapist, prayer partner, stand up comedian, and bestest friend eva!!! She selflessly spends her days off with us, and rather it's just providing the best company, or helping me out, every day with her is nothing short of a gift. The very best gift in all the land. I think I came out of the womb saying this but truly I don't know how I would do this life without her!!!
5. My mother in law. Seriously in echo of so many of the statements I made about my Momma, the very same applies for my mother in law. She too selflessly offers to watch my child, and pretty much do just about any and everything to help me out, whenever I need it. Like I have said before, I feel like she is my second Momma, we laugh, we talk, we cry, and we attempt craft and cooking projects that don't always pan out. It is absolutely no wonder why D is as incredible as he is, the apple fell 2cm away from the tree in this case, and thank God for that! I wouldn't be able to do this new job without the help, and love, and support I get from my Momma and Mother in Law. They are my right and left arm. I need them, and I love them so.
6..My friends. I'll keep it short because, well let's be honest I make most things rather wordy. But can I just say this...I have some pretty incredible friends. I have friends I've known forever, friends I've known for a year, friends that are neighbors, and friends that are facetime/skype friends. Truth is something happened about the time Liv was born, God answered my life long prayer for intentional, honest, genuine, love me for me, cheer me on, pray for me, funny, thoughtful, incredibly talented, smart, beautiful, friends. Some were new to my world, while others had been there a while but our friendships took on a whole new face, they became so much better than ever before. I never thought I'd have the kind of friends I have, and I seriously could not express properly my gratitude for those who love me for me, and those who I love so fervently.
ummm that wasn't supposed to rhyme, I swear!
7. Last today, I am thankful for God's provision. It's one thing to pray for things, to have dreams, but it's another with they come to fruition. God takes care of all the details. Not only did he give me an opportunity to make extra income, but he provided the technology to do so. My laptop, it's not a 2K mac, but it's nice and it works. I have a phone, although the battery is being held to the phone by tape (peace out t-mobile in t-minus 10 days) but it works and it allows me all the resources to do my job from anywhere. Today I'm thankful for all the ways that God provides, the ways that most days we all seem to overlook. I need nothing in this moment, I have more than I'll ever need, and so today, I wanted to spend my hours just being grateful for exactly what is in front of me.
It was a hard fought battle, to shake off the thoughts and feelings I woke up with, but I leaned on God and He told the devil to shove it. He fights for me, He loves me, and He is faithful to all of His promises. I mean really how cool is that?!?!?
Happy HAPPY Tuesday!!!
